The Blue Chair

The tiny office

Barely big enough for two

You come in and you sit down

That blue chair becomes a safe place

But it’s not easy sitting in that chair

You sit in that chair

And you let out your deepest feelings

You let out your darkest thoughts

It in no way is easy

You let out the stress from the week

While also trying to heal from your traumas

That happened both recent and long ago

But it easily gets to be too much doing both

You really feel your emotions in that chair

You come in each session

And you dig deeper and deeper

It gets so hard

You want to just stop

But then you hit a breakthrough

And you then want to keep pushing on

Just when you think you are better

Or even just making a little progress

When you least expect it

You get hit out of the blue

You get triggered

You feel yourself start to spiral

And now you have a choice to make

You can fight the pain and hurt

Engage in healthy coping

Bound and determined to not decline

And strive to stay positive and look forward

Or you could do the opposite

Act in negative and self-destructive behaviors

You allow yourself to spiral

And then you find yourself deep in this hole

And you don’t know how to get out

You need help from someone else

But asking for help is not an option

Reaching out might feel like you are weak

That you can’t do this alone

But in reality

Reaching out allow others in

And you can now get out of the hole

And you don’t have to do it alone anymore

At this point you already fought so much

And you did so on your own

So you’re not weak

You just reached you’re breaking point

And you need some help

It’s okay

It’s okay to need help

By the time you reach out it’s almost too late

And you then beat yourself up for waiting so long

Because you said last time

You wouldn’t let it get to this point before reaching out

But you did

And now you beat yourself up

As if you don’t also have enough going through your head

You reach out though

And you get the help you need

You have to accept the help too

Which can be very hard for some

If all they know is trying to do it alone

You get the help

And you once again become hopeful for the future

You no longer feel like you're in that deep dark hole

You feel like you can conquer what lays ahead

You become thankful for that help

To think about it

It in a sense all goes back to that blue chair

All of that tough work

The tears, the laughs, the battles, and the victories

It all has paid off in a way

Yes, your struggles started before that blue chair

But in reality

That blue chair is where your healing began

That is where you went when you decided you wanted help

When you first decided you wanted to get help

As hard as it was to sit in that chair at times

You put in the work to get better

You put yourself first

So it didn't quite start in that blue chair

But it was in that blue chair that you started to heal